Comfort Wipe

'Because toilet paper is really archaic and disgusting'
Introducing Comfort Wipe, the sanitary paper extension arm and holder!
YES! (sadly) it is a real product and not a spoof... and there's really no easy way to put this other than that it's a stick to help you wipe your arse, and avoid touching that 'disgusting toilet paper'. Great infomercial (as seen on TV):



Could this really be 'the first improvement in toilet paper, as we know it, since the 1880s'? Now you'll never have to touch a dirty toilet tissue!... hoorah